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Fri, 24 May 2013 09:45:34 -0700

faeiouck: shady-bacon: faeiouck: “all slytherins are evil” “all gryffindors are good...

Fri, 24 May 2013 09:28:29 -0700

shady-bacon:

faeiouck:

“all slytherins are evil”

“all gryffindors are good guys”

“ravenclaws are nothing but nerds”

“hufflepuffs don’t do anything”

Name one evil Gryffindor. One.

peTER PETTIGREW YOU LITTLE SHIT DO NOT QUESTION ME

Friend: You just like him because he's hot.

Fri, 24 May 2013 09:22:27 -0700

Friend: You just like him because he's hot.
Me: No it's because I think he's beautiful and perfect and everything I want in a man.

sabrinacaps: over the years, Harvey has learnt to not ask...

Wed, 22 May 2013 09:58:07 -0700

sabrinacaps:

over the years, Harvey has learnt to not ask questions.

Even at birth we are not innocent. We lived as parasites inside another.

Tue, 21 May 2013 23:03:04 -0700

Even at birth we are not innocent. We lived as parasites inside another.

When you’re walking though a crowd and hear “Last time I saw her she was at the bottom...

Tue, 21 May 2013 22:07:55 -0700

When you’re walking though a crowd and hear

“Last time I saw her she was at the bottom of an elevator shaft with an SUV rammed up her ass…”

legolasthranduillon: The Man Trap Oh my god. I remember this...

Tue, 21 May 2013 22:02:38 -0700

legolasthranduillon:

The Man Trap

Oh my god. I remember this episode (I think it was the 2nd one). The minute I saw this one chick go on screen I yelled “SHE’S A SHAPE SHIFTIER” - for what I thought was no apparent reason. It was not too long later that I discovered my insane ESP skills for cheesy si-fi.

Talks on serious matters

Tue, 21 May 2013 21:43:00 -0700

Mom: I saw your facebook today.
Me:
Mom: I didn't like your picture. You draw on my daughter's face.
Me: You mean the mustache one?
Mom: What if one day you ran for governor? People can use it against you.
Me: I think that'd help my campaign.

fuckyeahragetoons: pocahontas

Tue, 21 May 2013 09:40:22 -0700

fuckyeahragetoons:

pocahontas

and they be like: DAYUM GURL THAT BOOK SO...

Sun, 19 May 2013 22:36:00 -0700

and they be like: DAYUM GURL THAT BOOK SO THICK.
#I’veGot2027PagesAndEveryOne’sAProblem

less-than-one: Yes hello I am here for Gatsby’s party

Sat, 18 May 2013 00:50:00 -0700

less-than-one:

Yes hello I am here for Gatsby’s party

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Sat, 18 May 2013 00:43:55 -0700

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Fri, 17 May 2013 01:33:02 -0700

Friends: Hey Erika, wanna have a social life?School: Textbooks are your friends now. I should...

Wed, 15 May 2013 22:19:30 -0700

Friends: Hey Erika, wanna have a social life?
School: Textbooks are your friends now.

I should also note that all these text/reference books are being used for ONE CLASS I’m taking this semester. It’s a combined anatomy and physiology course. I thought it wouldn’t be that bad: People pass the class, I could pass the class - I had no idea.

Either way, I’m getting that A. Even if somebody has to bleed. I’ve worked too hard to settle for anything less. I’ve worked too hard to drop this class. Not now. The time I spent would have been wasted. I might have gotten a 76 on one exam - but I was scoring 99 and 89 on the first round of tests. I have the ability to kick ass. It’s in there - I’ve just got to kick it into high gear to maintain that status.

… and now… time to unplug and kick some ass… by flipping pages during the quiet time B students use to sleep. Not me though. I use this time to attack.

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Tue, 14 May 2013 21:53:37 -0700

"DiCaprio and Mulligan, meanwhile, don’t seem like star-crossed lovers so much as a delusional man in..."

Mon, 13 May 2013 23:32:00 -0700

“DiCaprio and Mulligan, meanwhile, don’t seem like star-crossed lovers so much as a delusional man in love with a bauble of a woman. Maybe that’s intentional?”

-
People Magazine’s review on ‘The Great Gatsby’

(via brucewaynes)

READ A BOOK

(via lexcanroar)

Oh my fucking god. I don’t want to live on this planet anymore.

(via morganosaurus)

^ You seriously don’t want to live on this planet because of a magazine review? Out of ALL the reasons you don’t want to live on this planet - it is because one person, whom you don’t even know, making an off statement in a publication read for entertainment. Shit, even when Sarah Palin was running for vice I still didn’t want to leave this planet.

I mean, where the hell would I go? Pluto?

Ain’t nobody got time for that.

Old person: The younger generation need to be more adventurous. Nobody's going out there to make a name for themselves.

Mon, 13 May 2013 23:10:53 -0700

Old person: The younger generation need to be more adventurous. Nobody's going out there to make a name for themselves.
Me: I'm sorry, but have you ever played a computer game called Oregon Trail? It basically teaches you that setting out to find gold will only lead to the horrible cholera related deaths of the individual who sets out, along with the rest of the caravan. My generation was raised on this crap. No adventure for us.

Oregon Trail

Mon, 13 May 2013 22:39:00 -0700

Curious, has anyone ever made it to California while playing Oregon Trail? Because every time I tried, everyone around me (or myself) would end up dying of cholera or dehydration. Honestly, it’s the most depressing game ever.

Sometimes I wonder what the hell the game makers were thinking.

Game maker: Hey, you know what kids now-a-days would totally dig? A game where they set out on adventure with a bunch of their friends
- only to watch most of them die
while continuing on a path, wondering:
Was this shit even worth it?
I paid how much for cattle/ horses and supplies?
Fuck.
I could have just used that money to buy a god damn farm.
The hell was I thinking.
Never again will I ever dream of adventure
NEVER.

You know, maybe it wasn’t about the kids. Maybe it was about the parents.

Buy their kids a game that teaches them to never leave them
Buy their kids a game that shows them that, when they do set out on their own, life is going to royally fuck them over - in every possible orifice it can get away with
It would also demonstrate that life intends to ruin your friends lives along with yours - particularly the ones that stand by you during your great adventure
You’re just not made for adventure, Bobby
Save up your money
Invest in cattle
Start a ranch
Buy a farm
- because god forbid you run away to find gold in California.

my study buddies are so hxc like you don’t even kno

Sun, 12 May 2013 17:35:00 -0700

my study buddies are so hxc

like you don’t even kno

What if there was a cross over between The Voice and Hell's Kitchen?

Sat, 11 May 2013 23:16:00 -0700

Ramsey: YOUR VOICE SHOULD BE RAW - NOT THE TENDERLOIN.
Ramsey: IF YOUR DESSERT WERE AS GOOD AS YOUR SINGING, IT'D STILL BE SHIT.
Ramsey: I TOLD YOU TO BRING DOWN THE HOUSE, NOT THE SOUFFLE.